I’ve been in the last cutdown of The Onion‘s brutal application process twice (that I know of), and, since they indicate a “strong preference for New York City residents” right in the solicitations, I figure making it to the last round while shuttling between Chicago and Miami is pretty good.   Enjoy.

Story ideas that were part of a solicited pitch to the Onion News Network as part of the tryout process.

This script, “DORITOS SWITCH TO ‘FREE-TRADE’ FIREY HABANERO” was written at-request, from a premise provided by “The Onion.”

This was a solicited audition script for the “Onion News Network,” who provided the basic premise.